A Letter to Thomas (not originally published)

My sweet Thomas,

I love you with all of my heart. Today is a day I have been dreading for a long time, and unfortunately there will be more like it. Today, I had to let you go to kindergarten. I am sure you will never understand how difficult this has been for me as your mother.

For six years, I have eaten breakfast, lunch, and dinner with you. I have put you down for naps and quiet times every day. I have taught you almost everything you know at this point. And this morning, I turned you over to someone else for 7 hours. I just can't imagine being without you the majority of the day. I am jealous that your teacher gets to spend so much time with you, and I am praying fervently that she will treat you with the love and respect you deserve.

You have such a sweet spirit. I have prayed for years that you would have teachers who understand the way God has uniquely made you - that they will be drawn to your sweet spirit, and that they will be able to lead you in the direction you need to go even when it is difficult.

You are so smart. I am amazed at all the things you know and remember. It has been so much fun to teach you, and I will continue to do so.

Last night as we were eating dinner, I realized we hadn't discussed prayers at school. In your preschool last year, you said a prayer before eating, but all of the sudden I realized that you would be expecting that and it isn't going to happen.  Of course, that made me sad, too. When I explained that the teacher can't pray with you, you didn't understand, but I told you to say your own prayer if you'd like!

I can't wait for you to get home on the bus to hear how your day went and what you thought. We will be eagerly waiting your arrival at the bus stop!

Thomas, I am in love with you! You are an amazing kid. My prayer for you continues to be that your love for God and your eagerness to learn will mature as your mature physically - the older you get, the more you love God! Although, I am happy to wait for you to grow up, I am looking forward to seeing how you allow God to mold you into the man He has created you to be, and I hope that He will continue to let me be a part of it!

I love you, sweetheart!

Love,

Mommy